When I was in high school, I joined speech and debate. I was terrible, but I stayed for all 4 years. By the time I hit college, I could speak publicly with ease, putting me ahead quite a bit. Now, I’m just an obnoxious pain in the ass so I kind of overcorrected.
Not being social.
I realized in my 40’s that my parents were wrong. You don’t actually have to be social butterfly to be happy.
I’m missing the need for social interaction. World didn’t end. I’m completely happy without it and there are plenty of jobs that don’t extensively need it.
So liberating. No amount of therapy really helped on the inside. It was all just pretending.
It’s tricky for me though because I’ve always had a social need. I don’t have a need for sex like the majority of other humans do, but I do have a need to be social. Lickily I fulfill most of my social needs by going to work, but it can be stressful at times.
Meds.
Meds are the only thing that has ever helped.
With meda you bite ?
Removing other stressors and toxic people from my life. Listening to emotional responses.
My anxiety from a rough relationship was giving me generalized social anxiety.
Sometimes you meet people and give then a chance before your figure it out. You can just cut them off once you see their toxicity. They’ll survive just fine so don’t worry about them. There’s plenty of other people who are ready for good and healthy friendships.
Training. I sold things at a market on weekends and told my kids it was “remedial sales and social skills training”. I’m still not a social butterfly by any stretch, but fake it till you make it helped me to be more comfortable talking to people.
Having a space to go where I can pull off the mask of “normal functioning human” for a bit.
Activism(´･ω･`)
Self-criticism fueled my anxiety and depression. Compassion and acceptance have significantly improved my well-being.
This is also a big issue for me. When I felt embarrassed because of something I did, I would tall myself, “You’re so stupid!” Which launched me into a shame spiral.
What has helped me break out of the spiral is to notice when I tell myself I am stupid and actively respond, “No I am not”
Sativa in small dosages, and getting older. Around 30 stressing about other people started to fade away
Therapy and making my peace with the past. Like working through it and then actively deciding to focus on the present from now on. This video actually kicked off my healing process.
As a person who learn English as 2nd language, i have a hard time understanding what she said in that video.
Wow thank you so much for sharing this!
Vipassana meditation. There are centers all over the globe offering free 10 day courses.
Wellbutrin
Doing socialization anyway … is the therapist-backed approach.
Nihilism works wonders I guess. So does not going outside.
A mixture of practice, and genuinely not caring what the outcome is.
Either medication, or getting a job working with the general public.
Edit: the job acting basically as exposure therapy helped more but I may not have been able to get it if I hadn’t started meds.
Everything’s related.
