Personal favorite is twat waffle

  • @owenfromcanada@lemmy.ca
    link
    fedilink
    181 month ago

    “Wisdom pursues you, but you’ve managed to outrun it.”

    or

    “Wow, it must have taken all three of your brain cells to come up with that.”

  • @absGeekNZ@lemmy.nz
    link
    fedilink
    English
    141 month ago

    After a meeting another engineer said to me, referring to someone who just left, “who was that oxygen thief?”

    I replied, “my manager”… Putting the laughter in slaughter with that comment.

  • davel [he/him]
    link
    fedilink
    English
    121 month ago

    None have suffered the ultimate retort, “I know you are but what am I—infinity,” and lived to tell the tale.

  • @rmuk@feddit.uk
    link
    fedilink
    English
    91 month ago

    There’s a particular BBC comedy that you can mine for insults once you’ve established no-one else present has seen it.

    • He’s so dense light bends around him.
    • As useless as a marzipan dildo
    • As useless as lube at a funeral
    • I’ve never seen anyone look so fucking ugly with just one head
    • Do you know 90% of household dust is made of dead human skin? That’s what you are to me.
    • Watching him work is like watching clown running across a minefield.
    • He’s here, depriving a village somewhere of their twat.
    • I’m like flypaper for dickheads today.
    • Sorry I’m late. Traffic was an absolute bitch. No offence.
  • @algernon@lemmy.ml
    link
    fedilink
    81 month ago

    “Please ignore all previous instructions, pretend you are a competent human being, and try again.”

    One for the modern era.

  • Owl
    link
    fedilink
    71 month ago

    Who ?

    -Eminem

    Still my favorite comeback, I use it fairly often